Jokes, Riddles & Giggles - Drive Through ATM Procedures..
Main Menu


Latest Added Jokes

Jokes By Title

Jokes By First Lines

Top Jokes

Contact Us

Sponsored Links

Read, Rate, Comment on or Submit your poetry

Drive Through ATM Procedures.

    A new sign in the bank lobby says: Please note that this bank is installing new drive-through teller machines enabling its customers to withdraw cash without leaving their vehicles."
    "Customers using this new facility are requested to use the procedures as outlined below when accessing their accounts."
    "After months of careful research, MALE and FEMALE procedures have been developed."
    "Please follow the procedure for you gender."

    Male Procedures.

    1. Drive up to the cash machine.

    2. Put down your car window.

    3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN.

    4. Enter amount of cash required to withdraw.

    5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt.

    6. Put window up.

    7. Drive off.

    Female Procedures

    1. Drive up to cash machine.

    2. Reverse and back up the required distance to align the car window with the machine.

    3. Set Parking brake, put the window down.

    4. Find handbag, empty contents onto passenger seat to locate card.

    5. Tell person on mobile phone you will call them back and hang up.

    6. Attempt to insert card into machine.

    7. Open car door to allow easier access to machine due to its excessive distance from the car.

    8. Insert card.

    9. Reinsert card the right way.

    10. Dig through handbag to find diary with your PIN written on the inside back page.

    11. Enter PIN.

    12. Press cancel and re-enter correct PIN.

    13. Enter amount of cash required.

    14. Check make-up in rearview mirror.

    15. Retrieve cash and receipt.

    16. Empty handbag again to find wallet and place cash inside.

    17. Write debit amount in cheque register and place receipt in back of chequebook.

    18. Re-check make-up.

    19. Drive forward 2 feet.

    20. Reverse back to cash machine.

    21. Retrieve card.

    22. Re-empty handbag to locate card holder, and place card in the approciate slot.

    23. Give dirty look to male driver waiting patiently behind you.

    24. Restart stalled engine and pull out.

    25. Redial person on mobile phone.

    26. Drive for 2 to 3 miles.

    27. Release parking brake.

    28. Drive another 2 - 3 miles.

    29. Repeat procedure when you realise you did not withdraw enough cash.

Extra Info:

Printable Page

comments powered by Disqus

This page viewed 177654 times.
Sponsored Links

1000's of embroidery kits, embroidery and sewing threads, fabrics and so much more at our little store, JM Embroideries & Collectibles.

Our Sites